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18-Jan-2017 17:32

I did, however, become friends with a girl who sat at my table during most of our classes.

We started bringing wine to class and gave each other boy advice.

Gradually, I let them in on this by asking them out on a friend date, texting them, emailing them, etc.

I assume a level of familiarity that is appropriate for already-established friends but not in a way that is invasive or entitled.

They’re between 28 and 40, that time of life when you’ve Friend-dating is a total slog.

You just keep throwing yourself in front of person after person, and even if those people are GREAT, sometimes they are just Not For You.

Many weeks passed where we try to tell our boys to write down phone numbers, or give them our phone number, and damn if kids are just like the most distracted and useless information holders.

Anyway, I finally deciphered a pencil scribbled phone number on a scrap of paper.

When I moved to San Diego I answered this ad on Craigslist that two girls posted looking for friends to go camping with. Also I hate camping, it was just the only ad that seemed to be written by real people. In Portland, I lived in a house and we had Sunday dinners that were pretty open and casual — if any of us met people out in the world, we’d invite them and sometimes people would come.

And they’ll never be For You no matter how hard you try.



May 22, 2015. Adult website AdultFriendFinder has confirmed it's working with law enforcement and data security experts following a data breach.… continue reading »


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May 5, 2016. In New York, I emailed people whose writing I liked and asked them out. Gradually, I let them in on this by asking them out on a friend date, texting them, emailing them, etc. I went on a camping trip with a bunch of new girls and we actually talked about the difficulty of making friends as a grown-up.… continue reading »


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