It's hard to know, because everybody's different, and that includes each butthole-fingerer's individual skill. It should basically just feel like you might need to poop. (I hope you don't.) "Relax your muscles, and breathe," advises Dr. You won't be surprised as much by your own, um, touch.
"So many women have bad first-time experiences and never want to do it again. It won't be the same as it would be coming from a partner, but it's a good way to feel out if you're into the sensation. This is a case where shower or bathtub sex might actually be good.
It depends on your levels of inhibition, your feelings about your partner, your feelings about your body.
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