Dating chinese man
While she leans her head on his in perfect contentment, he has his cheek buried in her bosom while staring at it with a prurient curiosity that surely would have snapped the girl out of her reverie.At the time I was only beginning to learn about negative stereotypes of Asian men that American TV, movies and the media had perpetuated over the years: effeminate, weak, nerdy and, worst of all, sexless and less endowed in a (ahem) certain department.As we stopped on the corner of a side street and watched the mostly-male populous pedaling past us through the intersection, she grimaced. they just aren't." She sounded too casual for a woman who just dismissed the entire male population in China."Chinese men don't really seem that attractive." "How can you say that? How could these women just write off all Chinese men as undateable?The woman who wrote that post never specifically said any of these things about local men in China, but she didn't have to. Then again, her post appears downright classy in comparison to what I've read in the free-for-all world of anonymous expat forums across China.There was a brief time when I tried combing these forums in search of discussions about dating Chinese men, hoping to gain some insights, but I soon gave that up.He was more of a gentleman toward me than any other man I had ever known.
This Shanghai Academy of Social Sciences professor surveyed over 100 Western women from diverse countries including France, Germany and the USA via questionnaires, and then interviewed over 20 of them in a focus group in Shanghai.
As I continued to date the locals in China and eventually married a fellow from Hangzhou, I would come to realize that most expat women in China agreed with my Zhengzhou colleagues. A European woman I worked with in 2001 famously told me that, while she found all Chinese men completely repulsive, she considered Chinese children so adorable.
But some of my most fascinating and educative encounters with this idea of "Chinese men as undateable" happened online, when I came face-to-face with these opinions distilled into the cold, black-and-white reality of blog posts and expat forums.
He helped me buy a bicycle at the secondhand market and even gave me a ride there on the back of his black metal bike.
When I came down with the flu, he accompanied me to my therapy at the clinic and read to me from with me -- one of the weepiest chick flicks ever made -- and actually shed a few tears when it ended.
I didn't know much about China back then -- a time when I could only communicate in Mandarin with a dictionary and lots of patience, and where my entire cultural knowledge was amassed from the library books on China I borrowed during the summer.