Dating someone less intelligent than you
You have to think a lot about how similar the two of you are in this department because it’s the conversations that the two of you have – and not your sexual attraction or any other factor – that will largely determine if the relationship will last or fizzle out over the course of months or even years. Think for a moment about where you would place yourself on a scale of 1 to 10 in the intellectual department.
Don’t focus on what you imagine or know your IQ to be.
Think about how much you enjoy talking about social, political, or academic issues. If you read books or magazines, are they light reads or do you prefer more in-depth fare?
Think also about how much you enjoy reading, and the kinds of things you read. How important is it to find someone who cares about the same intellectual issues you care about?
(My mother told me mine when I was a teenager, and I have always wondered if that was a good or bad idea!
) How intellectual you are doesn’t refer to your GPA in high school or college, or what you would score on standardized tests.
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So what i'm really asking you guys is should this intullectual gap be a real concern or should I focus on her great personality etc.
But if you are an intellectually-minded person and the person you’re with really isn’t interested in discussing things in depth, the two of you are going to run out of things to talk about, and you are going to start to feel disconnected emotionally from that person because you feel disconnected intellectually. When you start dating someone, take time to consider whether that person likes to talk about light subjects or whether he or she likes to talk about serious issues.
In the beginning, it is easy to overlook major differences – including how intellectual each of you is – because it is is so exciting and you can distract yourself with lust and getting to know that person.
It doesn’t refer to how many independent art house films you see in a year.
How intellectual you are, in simple terms, refers to how much you like to talk or think about serious subjects.
If you are someone who cares passionately about certain issues, you are probably going to want to have someone to discuss those things with on vacation. But after the honeymoon phase – say, a year or two – the tie that will bind a couple together is sharing similar values and intellectual interests.